Introduction

Scrolling through your Facebook feed can be a disheartening experience. It often seems like your friends’ lives are better than yours. They are going on the vacations you wish you could afford. “Oh there they are at Machu Picchu!” They’re getting career recognition you wish you could get: “Oh, they got promoted again?!” Their children seem so accomplished: “Oh, their oldest is now doing that residency in neurosurgery while their youngest just got into Harvard Business School. Great.” It can start to feel like you’re falling behind. When that happens, you might find a little bit of resentment creeping in. You may find yourself indulging in the second deadly sin: Envy.

I. The Vice: Envy

A. Definition and Consequences

1. Definition

In order to discuss Envy, we really need to clarify specifically what we’re talking about. Envy involves a few things. First, it involves seeing the good that others are (or at least seem to be) experiencing. Second, it identifies the blessing they have as something I should have. Third, it creates a resentment directed towards that person for having what I want and don’t have.

All of the other deadly sins involve some plausible promise of something good:Pride makes us feel better than others, and that feels nice. Lust offers pleasures (even if they are fleeting and destructive to others). Sloth can feel good, at least for a time But envy is deeply unpleasant we hate to envy, and even more we hate to be seen to envy. It makes us feel small.

2. Consequences

While envy isn’t something we enjoy experiencing, it is something we enjoy provoking. As American satirist Mark Twain once quipped, “A man will do many things to get himself loved; he will do all things to get himself envied.” Much of the social media toxicity comes down to this. People present a curated vision of their lives because they need to be envied to feel good about themselves.

A person I know has a social media profile that makes them look like everything is always great. So it was a bit of an eye opener when I was with them at an event where things weren’t great. There was tension and arguments and disappointments. But afterward, on social media, the account glossed over all of that. When I read this person’s account of what happened, I felt like they must live in an alternative reality. But we’re not in an episode of The Twilight Zone, this person just did what comes naturally to many of us, by presenting an aggressively stylized version of reality that misrepresents their life in order to provoke envy.

Envy makes us feel small and resentful, but to be envied makes us feel powerful and important. But, we should remember we seek to cultivate envy towards us, it makes others resent us.

B. The Root Cause of Envy

1. Anger & Transference

We might understand that envy is wrong because it sabotages our happiness and the happiness of others, but there’s a deeper problem with envy: It’s an accusation against God. If we believe that God is the giver of good gifts, then our envy is really saying, “God, you’ve misallocated your blessings. You have given them what you were meant to give to me!” Envy is a resentment of God’s generosity towards others (that often overlooks his generosity towards us). Because we can’t hurt God for this oversight, we transfer our anger to a more convenient target: the one who is enjoying the blessing we envy. Consider the example of Cain and Abel.

Now Abel kept flocks, and Cain worked the soil. In the course of time Cain brought some of the fruits of the soil as an offering to the Lord. And Abel also brought an offering—fat portions from some of the firstborn of his flock. The Lord looked with favor on Abel and his offering, but on Cain and his offering he did not look with favor. So Cain was very angry, and his face was downcast. Then the Lord said to Cain, “Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it.” Now Cain said to his brother Abel, “Let’s go out to the field.” While they were in the field, Cain attacked his brother Abel and killed him. (Genesis 4:2-8, NIV)

When they offer sacrifices, God accepts Abel’s sacrifice, but he’s not happy with Cain’s. Whatever the reason for God preferring Abel’s sacrifice, God’s approval of Abel provokes Cain’s envy. Cain’s anger, though not justifiable, should be directed towards God But since Cain can’t get back at God, he transfers his resentment towards Abel. His envy leads to resentment. His resentment leads him to murder. While the envy most of us indulge isn’t the kind that leads to a homicidal rampage, we need to recognize, that envy is an implicit accusation against God.

2. The Wrong Story

If envy stems from our assumption that God has given to someone else what I should have, is this a valid criticism of God? If God’s primary purpose was to bless me in all the ways I desire to be blessed, to my stay on this earth wonderful, if God is my concierge in the sky, then God’s unequal treatment might be grounds for a legitimate complaint. But this is based on a misunderstanding of what God is doing in the world, and of the part we are meant to play in it.

When I envy others for the blessings that God has given them, I do so because I am looking for ultimate meaning in penultimate things. What I mean by this is that God gives us wonderful blessings, but these blessings can only be properly enjoyed in a relationship where God remains at the centre, and these gifts, while important or desirable, are secondary. But instead, we’ve placed the gifts that God has given us (or that we wish he had given us) at the centre . God’s importance to us is merely as the one who gives us what truly satisfies. The good life must come from having the things that seem best here and now. This is exemplified in a T-shirt I remember seeing as a kid: “He who dies with the most toys wins.” Envy happens when we look to God’s gifts, rather than God to give us purpose, hope and satisfaction. Envy, then, is a symptom of idolatry.

Envy captures us because we believe a false story about the meaning of life, on a false belief about what is truly important. As long as we live according to that story, we will be unable to break free of Envy’s gravitational pull. If we want to be free of the misery of envy, we need to change stories so that we can learn its opposing virtue: Contentment.

II. The Virtue: Contentment

A. Learning To Expect Less?

Contentment means that we are satisfied with the things that we have. A content person doesn’t feel like they are hard done by, even when the people around them have things they wouldn’t mind having themselves. Who wouldn’t want contentment? The problem isn’t that we don’t desire contentment, the problem is that cultivating it is easier said than done.

How do we find contentment? Do we simply lower our expectations? Telling myself, “You’re expecting too much out of life,” doesn’t really help me expect less. So contentment isn’t about simply resigning ourselves to the fact that life will suck. (That’s not contentment, it’s despair). Neither will he fake-it-till-you-make-it approach to building contentment. If we simply tell ourselves we’re content often enough, it won’t become a self-fulfilling reality.

Again, envy is an accusation against God for failing to do something that God never promised to do. We can’t find contentment until we learn to let go of that expectation, replacing it with a more appropriate expectation. God is not a cosmic concierge whose job is to keep you happy and comfortable. Rather God is a redeemer who graciously includes us in his grand drama of redemption.

When we understand what God is doing, and our part in it, we can find contentment that isn’t dependent on getting the things we want. Paul demonstrates this in his letter to the Philippians. The Church in Philippi were early partners with Paul and his ministry. Philippians is basically Paul’s thank you note for a financial gift. Paul is glad for the gift, not because he was afraid he’s be left high and dry without it, but t because the Philippian church will be blessed by God for learning the discipline of generosity (which we’ll get to in a few weeks).

How can Paul be so nonchalant about getting gifts? He explains:

I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength. (Philippians 4:12-13, NIV)

Paul’s contentment isn’t based on what he has or doesn’t have, but instead on Christ at work through him. Paul understands his place in the story, and so he finds contentment. So what is the story we need to understand?

B. The Correct Understanding of Vocation

The old story tells us that meaning and purpose come from getting the things we want, or having the most toys. Our purpose becomes consumption Because the things we hope for don’t satisfy us for long, we’re constantly looking for the satisfaction that comes from novelty.

But God’s big concern isn’t meeting my passing fancies, it is rescuing his beloved, but broken creation. The world God created to receive his love is warped and twisted by the power of sin, and now everything God cares about is subject to the power of death. This is unacceptable to God, So God has given everything (even his son) to rescuing this creation, so that it can once again fulfill it’s purpose of perfectly receiving his perfect love.

If this is the one, overriding purpose that God is doing, then it is also the most meaningful thing in all of creation. And God invites us into that work. So our fulfillment doesn’t come from consuming goods or in provoking others to envy us, rather it comes from participating—by the Spirit’s power—in God’s renewal of all of creation. Paul unpacks his vision of this Christian vocation (our calling) in Romans chapter 8. 

Paul starts the chapter by explaining how God’s mercy encounters us as we come to faith: “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death” (Romans 8:1-2, NIV). We are those in Christ, who have been liberated by Jesus’ death and given the Spirit to transform us.

The Spirit reshapes our priority away from the things of the flesh. It’s the flesh that causes us to look for meaning in earthly goods, so envy is evidence of the flesh

Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. (Romans 8:5-6, NIV)

So if the flesh (our evil old selves) is running the show, we’re caught up in it’s desires, but the Spirit, changes what we desire. Paradoxically it’s by giving ourselves over to the Spirit, not in getting everything we desire, that we find true contentment.

Since God has saved us and given us a new life, we are indebted to him. How ought we to properly respond to this new life? “Therefore, brothers and sisters, we have an obligation—but it is not to the flesh, to live according to it. For if you live according to the flesh, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live” (Romans 8:12-13, NIV). The Obligation Paul says we have is to the Father (though he implies this rather than saying it explicitly), to live according the the leading and direction of the Holy Spirit.

If we do this, we are adopted children of God who will share in Christ’s suffering (meaning we will follow his pattern of co-suffering love) but also share in his glory.

For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory” (Romans 8:14,16-17, NIV).

Here, Jesus’ glory means his authority: As we lovingly suffer with Christ, we reign with him. Christians who obsess over exercising Jesus’ authority without his suffering love get this all wrong. Jesus doesn’t call us to exercise authority like worldly powers do. Instead he calls us to exercise authority like he does: by laying down our lives in suffering love for the rebellious world

“Suffering!? That’s not why I became a Christian!,” you might say. Paul explains that this suffering is worth it:

I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. For the creation waits in eager expectation for the children of God to be revealed. For the creation was subjected to frustration…in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God. (Romans 8:18-21, NIV)

The world is broken. And it longs to be set right, which will happen when it is ruled over by children of God. This doesn’t mean that when Christians take over the government and enact righteous laws. It means that when Christians are conformed to Jesus image, when they learn to love as he has loved us, then we will become God’s tool of restoring creation.

But while we wait for this to happen, we can’t help but by struck by the immense gap between the way the world is and the way God promised it will be:

We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption to sonship, the redemption of our bodies…. In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans (Romans 8:22-23,26, NIV).

Paul has explained that both the Spirit and the believer groan inwardly because the world is messed up. But the promise is that the church isn’t helpless in this: it is called to be God’s instrument to set this world right. “We know, in fact, that God works all things together for good with those who love him, who are called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28, NTE). I used the N. T. Wright’s translation here. The NIV and most other translations say “God works all things together for good for those who love him…” The Greek verb συνεργεω (synergeō), from which we get the word synergy, is traditionally translated here as ‘work’ is a compound verb, meaning syn (with) ergo (work). It means to work together with. So this verse isn’t a promise that everything will go well for Christians, but rather a promise that the church is God’s instrument for setting the world right.

Jesus shows us that God runs towards the place of pain in the world. If we have become like Jesus, we too enter into the world’s pain. We experience it along with others. God doesn’t deliver us from every pain and heartache, but instead asks us to follow the example of Jesus who was God’s incarnate presence at the place of human pain, entering into that pain. We also are called to empathize with those who hurt so we refuse to look away from suffering, rather we enter into with them and this moves us to intercessory prayer. God has sent his people to be his representatives to the places where the world is in pain, so that we may enter into that pain (as Christ entered into our pain) and so that through us, God can transform it (As Jesus transforms our mourning into joy).

III. Understanding Vocation Ends Envy

At this point, you might be asking yourself, “What does all of this have to do with envy?” Envy is the inevitable consequence of embracing the wrong vocation. If my purpose in life is to be happy and comfortable, envy is the response to the fact that I don’t experience that. Things I want that I don’t have and others do. That’s not fair! Because of this I will believe God is short-changing me, I’m angry at him and take it out on others.

Contentment comes from understanding that I’m a part of a bigger, more important story. My purpose is not to sit back, relax and enjoy life, but to become a reflection of Jesus, so that God can use me in the most consequential thing in the entire cosmos: The rescue of creation. God has saved me. Since I have been saved, he has sent me to those in pain so that I may embody his saving presence among those who desperately need to know it. This is the work that Paul was doing that allowed him to find contentment that wasn’t dependent on having everything he could ask for.

When I envy, it means I have been distracted from the important things God has given me to do, and instead gotten focused on the tools he has given me to do the job. Imagine an infantry division sent to Normandy in the last year of World War II. The soldiers have been issued rations because you can’t fight long on an empty stomach. But as the soldiers wait to be sent to the front, they get focused on their rations. Some start stealing rations from others, not so they can eat them, but because they suppose that the point of their being their is to see who can build the largest cache of ration tins. The soldiers’ behaviour would indicate that they’ve lost track of why they are there. They’re supposed to be there in a struggle against tyranny, but they’ve totally lost sight of that mission and made acquisition of the tools intended to aid them in their mission into the mission itself. This is what envy is. It misses the whole reason why God has placed us on this earth, and sets our attention on things that don’t really matter much and can never satisfy us.

We all long for purpose and meaning and significance. We don’t get these things by getting what we envy. Think about the things we desire: a better house, a swankier car, Career advancement, athletic ability, perfect pitch, a full head of hair, metabolism that lets me eat like a teenager in middle age, a more attractive spouse, better-mannered children. Really ask yourself, If I had these things, would I really be content, or would I just find more ways to envy others around me?

Contentment will elude us when our gaze lingers on what others have. Instead let’s change our focus. As our focus moves from the things others around us have, to the beauty of Jesus who comes to rescue, we’ll see things differently. As songwriter Helen H. Lemmel wrote:

Turn your eyes upon Jesus
Look full in His wonderful face
And the things of earth Will grow strangely dim
In the light of His glory and grace.